I've said it before, and I'll say it again-- it's hard to be a girl.
Not only do you have the ages of unfair treatment from men to deal with, but the even worse issue is the unfair treatment that we deal out to each other.
I think that I've tried to forget what it was like to be a girl growing up-- all of the back biting, spiteful little things that girls do-- but having a daughter brings it all back.
Who can forget the "secret clubs" and the "you're not my best friend anymores"? What about "she's copying me!" and the "if you talk to her, I'm not going to be your friend?" Let me assure you, those time honored snips are still alive and kicking.
I've discovered something horrible that I never before imagined, though. It is WORSE the second time around. It was bad enough when I was younger and it was happening to me. It is much worse to watch my daughter fight these battles and realize there is very little I can do about it.
Sure, I can try to instill in her a positive self esteem and be there for her and all that crap, but mostly, I'd just like to call the mean girls out! I know, I know--that's not going to help her in the long run, but I'm discovering that being a parent means living on the sideline-- and that's not a role I've ever liked.
Sometimes I think it would be fun to be a kid again-- and then I remember the days when you'd been fighting with your friends and the thought of getting up and going to 6 hours of school with people you were sure hated you was just too much to bear. Everything seems so tragic and final when you're nine.
It seems easier to be a boy. They get mad, they punch each other, and the next day they are friends again. Not us. I still cringe every time I see this one girl that I hated in grade school.
Some things never change.
3 comments:
OOOHHHHH! It truly is just as fresh and a lot more horrible when it's your own daughter. I still cringe away from the girls I have known and duck out of the way when I see certain ones clear across a store. Am I a coward? Heck no! I just don't want to go up to them and start the whole process again in anger because of the fear that their little girls might be the ones tormenting mine. But I don't think it's definitely easier for boys unless they are one of the bigger boys, the small ones take so much crap from the others that it's just as heart breaking. Each age has its' own challenges but I sure wouldn't like to relive being 9-15 for anything!
That stinks!!!! It's never fair or easy - haven't they heard "can't we all just get along" :). You made it through though and so will she. Remind me that I said this when it's my turn okay!
My mom used to say, "There is nothing meaner than a fifth grade girl." I have to agree. Good luck with everything! I'll probably be coming to you for advise in a few years...
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